I suspect that my nemesis is doing everything in her power to bring me within killing range. Next thing you know, she'll be doing the 'toast in the mouth' meeting scenario, and then POW:
...HIDDEN BLADES IN THE HAIR, SLICING ME TO BITS.
EDIT for context:
Scene: Lunchtime(WHY IS MY NEMESIS USING THIS HOLY HOUR TO MAKE ATTEMPTS ON MY LIFE WHYYY)
Me: Right, time to run to somewhere far away fro...
Nemesis: Hey! Let's go eat at <restaurant>.
Me: No, I'm good...
Nemesis: No, really, it's just nearby.
Me: -considers limited spending money and remembers that this restaurant is money-efficient- ...Fine.
Inner Me: Look on the bright side, it's located near a major highway, and it's highly visible.
Me: You're right. It's a public place. No way she can kill me in front of too many witnesses.
Weather: Sunny, with plenty of clouds. Have fun, humans (and eldritch abomination)!
Me: Uh...why are you bringing your handbag?
Nemesis: My girly necessities, what else?
Me: ....Riiiight, let's go.
-proceed to eat cheap spaghetti and cheap sundae, no assassination attempts made, so hooray-
Me: Right, it's time to go.
Weather: Remember when I said it was sunny?
Me: YOU SUNSON OF A BITCH. NOW HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET BACK TO WORK ON TIME?!
Nemesis: -reaches into handbag, pulls out an umbrella- Well, we could...walk back, it's only a short distance away.
Me: ...Fine.
Inner Me: NO, DON'T DO IT, SYNBIOS.
Me: What?
Inner Me: SHE BROUGHT HER BAG ONLY TODAY. SUNNY WEATHER SUDDENLY TURNS RAINY. CONNECT THE DOTS!
Me: Oh...oh, no. Oh no no. Oh no no no nonononononononono...She didn't...
Inner Me: Yes, she did - she can control the weather...and she just set you up for a 'walk under the umbrella' trap.
Me: And she has just forced me to choose between being late for work and being in extremely close proximity with whatever weapons she may have concealed in her bag during the walk back. The rain will also slow down our walk, giving her more time to prepare an ambush!
Inner Me: And you can't be late, it would make you look bad on record.
Nemesis: -tilts head curiously-
Me: ARGFBLEARGBLEARGSSDFJLAKL
And then we made it back, where I spent five and a half hours preparing test data for our client site.
@Synbios: when I bring my umbrella and ask a guy to walk under it with me, it's because it's practical and makes sense. No kappa required
Bring a poncho next time if you're so scared!
"Faded away like the stars in the morning, Losing their light in the glorious sun, Thus would we pass from this earth and its toiling, Only remembered for what we have done."
@Synbios: when I bring my umbrella and ask a guy to walk under it with me, it's because it's practical and makes sense. No kappa required
Bring a poncho next time if you're so scared!
Obviously, you're not an assassin contracted to kill mUNLESS YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO MAKE ME LOWER MY DEFENSES I'M ON TO YOU NOW HUMAN I'VE GOT MY EYE ON YOU.
Met our very charming club pro's wife the other day, and then a couple days later the manager said he hadn't been around for a horse emergency (someone's horse got beat up in the trailer) because he had to take his girlfriend to the hospital. It was probably all just a misunderstanding, but I like to imagine that it's a bad romance novel, and I know a certain 78 year old gossip monger who is going to love it.
But I produced the second useful result at my new work today! Yay! Prior to this, in the first two weeks I only made some annotations onto a diagram. I'm on an extra-fast track to becoming an expert in a very specific domain.
We are all totally going to say "I knew Vadi when..." someday
Rly grateful for that Android app called Health Tap. I've tried community hospitals for free but it's really hard to wait in line while writhing in pain. Now,I can just writhe while I wait for answers xD
Bleh, work ate my gaming life. 내가 제일 잘 나가!!!111!!1
Rly grateful for that Android app called Health Tap. I've tried community hospitals for free but it's really hard to wait in line while writhing in pain. Now,I can just writhe while I wait for answers xD
Good thing they have a rep system, otherwise you wouldn't know if your answers came from Larry, the 10 year old kid down the block with a dictionary.
I hope Synbios and his nemesis start dating so he can show these to her. This is great. :x
I LOL'ed because if this were transcribed into a novel(I SEE WHAT YOU'RE UP TO, @Sherazad DON'T THINK I DIDN'T REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAID), it would be more of a survival-horror action suspense novel, except the big bad monster is the helpless victim being hunted down by the human. Like some sort of reverse-Psycho/Saw/The Thing/Pan's Labyrinth/Mars Attacks!/The Naked Gun amalgamation.
@Synbios: when I bring my umbrella and ask a guy to walk under it with me, it's because it's practical and makes sense. No kappa required
Bring a poncho next time if you're so scared!
Obviously, you're not an assassin contracted to kill mUNLESS YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO MAKE ME LOWER MY DEFENSES I'M ON TO YOU NOW HUMAN I'VE GOT MY EYE ON YOU.
I get the term "poisonous bitch" from The Proposal - except it better describes my previous coworker. That bossy, plus "the world owes me a livin'" attitude, plus a permanent "where did I go wrong with my life"/"it's everyone else's fault" outlook. Plus 4 rotten kids. Plus resenting anyone that worked hard to get where they are in life. Also just plain full of hate.
I get the term "poisonous bitch" from The Proposal - except it better describes my previous coworker. That bossy, plus "the world owes me a livin'" attitude, plus a permanent "where did I go wrong with my life"/"it's everyone else's fault" outlook. Plus 4 rotten kids. Plus resenting anyone that worked hard to get where they are in life. Also just plain full of hate.
So...just enough poison to make antivenom for only 10 daddy long-legs.
(Yeah, I remember having to deal with customers like that.)
Nothing to report on the home front, barring a minor case of my nemesis apparently inheriting the minor sniffles that I earlier obtained from inclement weather.
On the other hand, paternal familial unit woke us up at 5 in the morning, and left us.
Oh, and he told us that he was going to the airport to receive a package from our uncle.
Comments
Bring a poncho next time if you're so scared!
Losing their light in the glorious sun,
Thus would we pass from this earth and its toiling,
Only remembered for what we have done."
i'm a rebel
내가 제일 잘 나가!!!111!!1
[ SnB PvP Guide | Link ]
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One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important
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One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important
they keep flying into my ipad at night when im reading on my kindle app whilst having my ipad in my windows carry case
i'm a rebel
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One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important