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Predatory Advances
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Penwize has cowardly forfeited the challenge to mortal combat issued by Atalkez.
Often they're not obviously making an -advance- as such (it's not like they send you a tell going "ay bby u want sum fuk?"), thus it feels like an overreaction to issue or report them because technically they haven't done anything wrong. And while you're pretty sure what their intention is, they haven't actually said anything to that effect, giving you the opportunity to say no and you also don't want to be rude, being new here.
My advise is to simply stop responding. Responding will get you nowhere, just don't. If they persist you can choose to either take the "tell them to please leave you alone" route, (they will pretend to be hurt that you would understand them so wrong) or simply IGNORE them.
If however you've asked them to leave you alone and they don't, then feel free to issue them.
You can also additionally ISSUE ME and alert the admins about the person as mentioned before. If you ISSUE ME it won't alert the person in question, so you avoid the "overreaction" feeling but it does alert the admin to keep an eye on them for future transgressions.
Once you tell someone no, go away, and they keep up, there's no way they're unaware. Feel free to issue.
Site: https://github.com/trevize-achaea/scripts/releases
Thread: http://forums.achaea.com/discussion/4064/trevizes-scripts
Latest update: 9/26/2015 better character name handling in GoldTracker, separation of script and settings, addition of gold report and gold distribute aliases.
IGNORE and ISSUE ME are your friends. What @Tibitha said, where it doesn't alert the person that you've brought them up to the admins. It can be far less confrontational for those people, who like myself, would rather avoid it in matters like that. I mean, when I started playing ten years ago I didn't know about issuing or whatnot, and so I ended up using rather drastic methods to avoid such scenarios.
But yeah, now I would just issue myself, explain the situation, and get the hell out of there.
Do we need to have it in the intro quest that a gnarly gnoll tries to have his/her way with you? It's ridiculous.
Maybe we need to break immersion before we start and say some basic stuff that needs to be said. Sometimes I feel like we're failing TNG before they've even started.
But this person as far as I'm aware gets the hint and leaves people alone.
**** tells you, "*drops a cookie in your mouth*"
You tell ****, "I find it very hard to concentrate when some unspecified cookie comes up and starts dry humping my mouth."
You tell ****, "No one wants your -insignificant- cookie anywhere near them."
You tell ****, "If I find it again, I will take that cookie and its jar and smash it into so many pieces that no-one will recognize it."
You tell ****, "Teeheehee."
So Im going around doing my thing and noticing guys are trying to be unusually conversational and helpful. Popping up while Im hunting, trying to sound friendly and using corny emotes like winking, romping and pouncing. So Im like, first of all guys don't talk to each other this way so why is this character so popular all of a sudden. Then when one of them made a casual reference about his genitals I was overcome by a moment of crystal clarity. He thinks I'm a she. The only thing I could think to do was instantly try to sound as manly as I could. I said Bro, Im a dude. It felt super ackward, then he said you need to change your name. I said Bro did you even look at me, I have a beard man.
So yeah, I can't remember that characters name anymore but it did make me glad I don't have to regularly deal with all that drama.
Thank you all for the advice! It's really awesome to see how supportive the game is.
Within 10 minutes of graduating the trial, I had at least two (I think it was three but I'm not sure), "random" people from unrelated factions send me tells. They weren't exactly sexual, things like "Hey cutie how are you?" but I knew exactly what was going on. One of them was from Mephaos and I forget the other.
I chose to just ignore it, but received several follow-up tells from him and finally made a Mudlet gag for him.
The in-game ignore function is going to be your friend with those sort of people, and issuing them if it's sexual harassment in nature is something you should do without question.
We don't want those types of players in Achaea.
This experience just seems ridiculously prevalent, and it obviously shouldn't be. I obviously can't say what happens behind the scenes, but the current system seems to be that if they don't stop when you say you aren't interested, then that's what gets them shrubbed. This would make a lot of sense if this were a rare and isolated problem, but it seems like there are people who might well take no for an answer, but are still propositioning a ridiculous number of newbies, and it doesn't seem as if there are repercussions for them. There was a time a few months ago when I was messing around in Cyrene some that over a period of a few days, three different newbies were propositioned by the same guy, and I only know about those because they asked the city about what they should do. That people can get away with doing this sort of thing is a problem.
I wonder if being more strict about approaching new players in that way might help. The current system puts the onus on brand new players, some of whom may well be fourteen or fifteen (regardless of what the TOS actually "requires") to be the ones who have to navigate both the mechanical and personal ways of handling these sorts of situations. Putting those sorts of burdens on the harasee has some problems itself, I think, but in a game where new players, particularly those who might be inexperienced with muds, are already confronted with a whole lot of brand new stuff they need to work out, having to work this out too seems like it could only scare people off. Even when they navigate city chat and stuff well enough to ask for help, which is itself hardly a guarantee, this is hardly the introduction to the game that people should be receiving.
People who are repeatedly hitting on people just out of the trial should be warned then banned, IMO, even if they're leaving people alone after being asked to. This sort of shit is way too prevalent, and plenty of people seem to be getting away with it under the current system.
As for predators, IRL and IRP, I feel they very much need something significant removed from their body at the very least. Definitely do ask them to leave you alone and /ignore promptly, and if they keep trying from there, ISSUE them. Not even a question. Wishing it was easier than that to catch them since it gives them plenty of chances to stay under the radar. All the same I'm glad someone spoke up. Wish more would. Because these people need lives that they won't find here.
I completely agree with @Nakari. I don't think a hard enough line is being taken, or at least, I don't think the playerbase can see a hard enough line being taken which, from a community betterment perspective, is equally important. Also "name and shame" (although I think we should) probably doesn't get you most of the way there, because the most egregious examples are probably done on alts.
Personally, I'd like to see an upheld issue of sexual harassment leading to publication, by the admin, of not just the character name that harassed but all names tied to the same account. I'd also like to know the following:
I think that there shouldn't be an escalating scale for these issues. First offence should be a non-discretionary shrubbing of all characters, not just the offending one, for a period (maybe 30 days), then any repeat offence leads to permashrubbing across all characters.
I think it's easy to jump in and say "this isn't tolerated" because of course it isn't, but I do think a bit more information from the admin on the approach would really help us see follow-through on that.
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