Amusing/Entertaining/Interesting things you stumbled upon on the Internet

Achimrst

Arador

Xith

Kerria said:

You can't stumbleupon Facebook. That's like instagramming a tweet.

Krypton

Friend sent me this photo he took on his phone. Here is his commentary:

"I can't help but to be so fascinated by this woman in my class. She uses her tits as pillows"

Tharvis

Kerria

Berenene

Oh god, I love TFS. DOOOOGE!!!!
 

Also, Mr Popo can really sing

Xith

Severina

Cynlael

These posts are great.

Kerria

Cant finish House budget project , a duck is asleep on my calculator.
I'm so going to use this.<3

Achimrst

Berenene

Those eyes

Harmonia

This must be shared.
http://www.bobstaake.com/badchildrensbooks/

Tesha

Kadin

How I feel everytime I change classes and I get through the almost week of recoding stuff and finally am functional again. 

Kayeil

 

Kerria

Sense of humour. Yep

Jeslyn

Not sure why he is bad with people, he got quickly to the point!

Xith

Xith

Mindbending

Kerria

Does this prove that breast cancer is not created by GMO's, food coloring or Starbucks coffee?
http://siberiantimes.com/science/casestudy/features/iconic-2500-year-old-siberian-princess-died-from-breast-cancer-reveals-unique-mri-scan/

Eld

Kerria said:

Does this prove that breast cancer is not created by GMO's, food coloring or Starbucks coffee?
http://siberiantimes.com/science/casestudy/features/iconic-2500-year-old-siberian-princess-died-from-breast-cancer-reveals-unique-mri-scan/

That breast cancer existed before those things? Sure.* That those things aren't carcinogens? Nope.**

*No idea how accurate the interpretation is likely to be. My guess is much less so than the authors of the press release and subsequent articles would like you to believe.

**I don't actually know of any reason to think any of those things are carcinogenic. But this study has no bearing on that question.

Cynlael

Xenomorph

Ulrike said:

Achimrst said:

xenomorphgank.jpg

This has been my desktop wallpaper for a bit:

Interesting little side note about this promotional picture I was involved in several years back. Just before I was granted citizenship by the IRE immigration office and left shit-ass Mexico City and its sadly ignored smog dilemma, I was doing gigs promoting an OOC franchise (Going to leave it anonymous as to which one -we are being hosted by IRE, and it's irrelevant to the discussion anyways) and that's how I paid the bills.

I did media advertisements and photo shoots, primarily on the road promoting this franchise alongside the big fella with the tusks you see seated on the left. (Ha, yes yes, I knew it would come up, so to answer your question that handsome young buck you see seated to the right in ever contemplative  chess playing posture is indeed..yours truly. Well, just much much younger obviously. What's that? Well, no shit. Yes, I am fatter now, but you get older and shit happens, save the laughs.)

So back to the original point, interesting trivia about this picture. That "rival" Yautja bipedal muscle freak on the left is actually a good colleague of mine, you know him as Predator, but to me he's simply my old college roommate and Syracuse Rowing Team Varsity teammate, Doug Abernathy. We could beat any other rowing team by a mile, well, until they reminded us our combined strength is so ridiculously powerful to human rowers, that even losing once for us would be so inexcusable, we'd be kicked off the team for being dipshits. We never had to worry about losing though. Turns out steroids are against the "rules" and when we came forth that we are steroid dealers -so the entire school is all equally able to indulge, was flawed logic. And it got us thrown off the team. F**k rowing anyways, who even cares, I mean seriously. Lol, laws against steroids but no law banning pointless water sports that universally snobbish circles take entirely too seriously isn't? I wanna start the homeless rowers league just to tarnish those snooty pricks even a bit. Anyways.

So despite the "Alien vs Predator" nonsense most people can't stop typecasting us for (or running in the most extreme of terror) we are far, FAR from the arch enemies you'd expect, we're just two franchise badasses that didn't actually appear in any Hollywood roles, those were relatives of ours (but  sometimes men in suits and always cheesy looking computer effects that try to replace the real thing) we're just lucky enough to be from our respective franchise homeworlds and got offered work doing advertising for the franchise, hence the chess game we are quite realistic in depicting, as we are both very disciplined character actors.

See that thoughtful Bobby Fisher chess pose I'm immaculately depicting? We are professionals and very good at what we do. I simply fit into any role well, and this should come as no surprise because you all know who the f**k I am anyways.

Problem was, myself and Doug were already exhausted from all the touring and advertising venues the franchise books us in, and to complicate things further, neither of us had any fu**ing fraction of a clue what a chessboard is or if they are saying 'Chest.' 

So we put our heads together and decided chess was slang term for something else. Doug and I quickly ascertained it couldn't be checkers, ruling that one out because we don't even know what that is either. 

We agreed that the game board was more than likely square in shape, but we never ruled out triangle or parallelogram, in the event we don't know what a square shape is either. So we concluded its probably maybe but without a shadow of a doubt, a Monopoly game board.

But a Monopoly game board you'd expect if it's missing a bunch of sh*t. In our unquestionable minds, sadly the production staff skimped on providing a new, photo shoot worthy game set. This one lacked Boardwalk, Park Place, the railroads, shit, the entire graphics presence must have completely worn off, obviously a very finger-fu**ed hand me down edition from state pen. 

The clear lack of any hotel pieces and player tokens (I'm always the fu**ing shoe, I won't play with you if you be a little bitch and try and take the shoe game token from me when I'm invited to a game) or a pair of dice for Christ's sake put the whole photo shoot in jeopardy that day.

-This is when all out pandemonium erupted. The production crew told us to get in role and simulate playing chess, so we could get the shoot finished up. I quickly reeled us all back into reality, pointing my donut-hooks right at the prehistoric Parker Brothers attempt at Monopoly, the centerpiece of the entire production.

So without deeds, funny money, get out of jail cards, oh, maybe my FUCKING SHOE GAMEPIECE, or any semblance of a production staff bringing some professionalism to work, how the F**K are we supposed to simulate our rivalry?

The director is the one who caused the incident and massive litigation that followed the pandemonium that erupted that hot stressful day, he looked at me dumbfounded and said, "Xeno, that..isn't a Monopoly board, it's a Chess set."

I can still see the know-it-all look that smug co****cker probably never really did but isn't around now to argue with my version of what was about to happen.

Doug turns to me, a little bit perturbed and clearly out of patience, "What did he just say?"

I turn my long shiny black eyeless banana shaped carapace dome noggin to my right, slowly, and told Doug the only thing I could gather at this point.

"He just called us a couple queers."

I didn't even register the sound of the ice blue shot erupt from Doug's shoulder mounted plasma caster, I just remember the dipshit director exploding into a crimson vapor as crack after deafening crack erupted from that plasma caster and turning a day at work into pure fu**ing bedlam. 

I saw red overtake my vision, and not to be outdone by Doug, I hurled my massive black armored carapace towards the gaffer with my trademark high pitch squeal I only let out when I'm fu**ing sh*t up or getting shot at by machine gun turrets. 

Like pulling an insects tiny limbs apart, I ripped every limb from his body with ease, finally using my inner jaw to snack on his brain with an audible hiss before my littler mouth got to feast on some brains, maybe recover some energy since the dipshit caterer didn't bring Red Bull again. Not a problem.

In a blinding flash, running across the ceiling,I'm chasing the caterer and with an almost hydraulically powerful rotation using way more power than necessary, I tail whipped that cheap bastard through the torso, leaving red stains of horror all over the walls that serve notice that Quizno's is some pretty fu**ing weak sauce catering and all the blood and guts left behind clearly demonstrate we are Pizza Hut guys.

The all occurred in less than 15 seconds of truly horrific fury. It's at this point I should probably clarify we are still very much hyper-dangerous and extremely unworldly morals, and being rude like the director may well might have been, it's like Hannibal Lecter said, don't be rude or you'll wind up as dinner. Manners people, ffs. 

Doug's razor sharp boomerang finished off the last of executives with a frightening hum, right as I finish stealing the change out of a register of a McDonalds that got too close. We only regret one death in all this, an unlucky  cab driver, who in death, finally serves a true purpose. Because his family got stuck with the missing Taxi cab bill when me and Doug carjacked that hoopty and got the fu** out of dodge.

The rest is history, I fled to Achaea, and came to be the bad mother fu**er you guys get to hang out with. 

Doug? I tried to convince him to come to Achaea and make a living there, but he refused, and said I was a was making a mistake, then ditched me for another path in life. 

I heard he got into some pretty serious shit, and is half retarded now and regrets not listening to me. Tried to warn him.

The moral of the story, the Xenomorph wins, not the dipshit who made the mistake of picking Aardwolf.

Tharvis

wat

Cynlael

Just Xenomorph with another world class post, is what.

Ruth

I recently discovered the joys of Star Trek!

Cynlael

Shibumi

I was not aware of this. I really could not believe it!