Amusing/Entertaining/Interesting things you stumbled upon on the Internet

Trey

Berenene

I feel really bad for laughing at that.

Siduri

I feel really bad at not getting it <.<

Kaden

Took me a while to get it. That was horrible...but funny.

Cidusii

NZ weather reporting at its finest.

Cidusii

Kresslack

Best.Prank.Ever.

Cynlael

Synbios

Trey

Daslin

@Trey That's my daughter!

Trey

Bullshit, that story has a wife. Who would marry -you-?

Daslin

@Trey ....*sniffle*

truthhurtssomuch

Anaidiana

@synbios, @trilliana, @berenene - GAH forgot Christopher Lloyd in Anastasia. And whoever voiced Bartok. 

Achilles

New workout routine:

How to lose MASSIVE amounts of weight! We need to figure out a way to market this! Any ideas??? Worth reading to the end- I promise!

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5lbs weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck..

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later puffing and puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 5lbs as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/10lbs program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me".

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 10lbs as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/25 lbs program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you are mine."

He lost 33 lbs that week.

Berenene

Achilles said:

New workout routine:

How to lose MASSIVE amounts of weight! We need to figure out a way to market this! Any ideas??? Worth reading to the end- I promise!

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5lbs weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck..

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later puffing and puffing, he finally gives up. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 5lbs as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/10lbs program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me".

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 10lbs as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/25 lbs program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, you are mine."

He lost 33 lbs that week.

Well, would you look at that, I fell down.

Trey

EDIT: Also, to quote my reply on Facebook to the person who posted this to me:  I think the most upsetting thing about this is that it showed how much the internet has blasted my mind with 'cannot unsee' content. I took a look at this picture and thought "That poor guy. Not only did he get burnt to shit, now his arm looks like a horse dick."

Cynlael

Orzaansyn

Daslin said:

@Trey That's my daughter!

No, that's me.

Tharvis

Synbios

Cidusii said:

@Cidusii: If this were canon, it would serve as delicious irony for Voldemort, who was looking for a way to stay immortal.

Synbios

By the power of the TARDIS!

[spoiler]

[/spoiler]

Exelethril

So cute, hrrngh.

Achilles

Synbios

I disassociate myself of any link to this deviant genetic derivative of mine that has a fetish for humans. 

[spoiler]

Translator's note: 'senpai' means upperclassman, usually used in a school-based setting.

[/spoiler]

Trilliana

Every time I decide to get in shape ...

Valdus

Ok. Hate to break it to you guys, but David Tennant was the greatest Doctor of ALL TIME.

I don't care if it's a pun. It's fucking TRUE!


Edit: @Synbios posted a picture that enraged me. That is all. >.>

Accipiter

@Valdus it is like you have never heard of Tom Baker.

Trey

Valdus said:

Ok. Hate to break it to you guys, but David Tennant was the greatest Doctor of ALL TIME.

I don't care if it's a pun. It's fucking TRUE!


Edit: @Synbios posted a picture that enraged me. That is all. >.>

That might be true, but the writing is a lot better for the Matt Smith stuff. Case in point:

note: This is how you say 'Come at me, bro' in UK English.

Trey