Descriptions

Nicaara

There's a couple other threads for this, but I wanted to start a new one, especially considering those who previously posted descriptions have probably changed or tweaked then by now, and many people who asked for opinions and help didn't receive any. And I've always liked reading/writing descriptions. 

So what's your description? Are you ugly? Beautiful? A poor writer? How do you interpret your racial characteristics? Do you like it short and simple or long and elaborate? What are your description pet peeves? Do you need any help with your description? 

Kitiara

She is a winged atavian. She has straight long black hair that hangs down her back and curls at the ends. Two thin, dark eyebrows arch over her piercing grey eyes, both shining a tint of blue in the light. Angular lines and high cheek bones make up her face which holds a constant look of determination and assertiveness. Her two grand ebon wings protrude from her pale skin arching around her 5ft tall slender figure, shadowing. A portion of her flesh on her left forearm has been singed into a branded symbol. 

I keep it short and simple.  I guess I should edit and give her some battle scars. I threw this together quickly and probably should update it at some point.  However seeing as she is serpent she doesn't get looked at often enough to care about changing it. She likes hiding and feels awkward and naked when not hidden.

Bluef

She is a beautiful siren. Petite and fine-boned, her lissome body has an ethereal quality, giving the impression that her form wavers upon the line between dream and reality. Shadowy tresses flow from her head in a torrent of languid curls, framing her face before cascading whimsically over her bare shoulders in gentle waves to her trim waist. Tucked behind her ear, the slender stem of a violet flower twists into a velvety whorl of petals. Serene, cobalt blue eyes gaze dreamily from beneath her delicate, dusky lashes and a beguiling smile of contentment drifts across her lips. Pale and unblemished skin, redolent of orchids and the faint scent of crushed tea leaves, follows the supple contours of her nimble physique.

Short and simple for me too. Anything over 10 lines of description (for a room, a person, an item, etc.) and I just don't even bother reading it.

Sarapis

He is a radiant immortal. He is clad in simple grey robes, the cowl of which hides His face.

I like to keep things simple.

Nicaara

Agreed. Once upon a time I had a description so long I think I had to cut it to not exceed the limit. Some detail I think is best left to revealing through roleplay - if you give yourself away entirely from the start, there's nothing left to say. Other than maybe... TL;DR!

Trey

Sarapis said:

He is a radiant immortal. He is clad in simple grey robes, the cowl of which hides His face.

I like to keep things simple.

He is completely naked.

Aereidhna

She is a human with tanned, lightly freckled skin. Small and lissome, her graceful posture gives an impression of regal bearing that belies her brief height. Unkempt saffron curls fall to her waist, the reddish-orange of a Vashnarian sunset. Vibrant crocuses and snow blossoms are braided in here and there among the coarse strands. A few wayward curls frame her oval face, offsetting a petite, upturned nose and gently tapered chin. Her large, luminous eyes are the textured green of malachite, ripples of pale mint and dark moss.

Boringly pretty (for a human, although she's constantly surrounded by sirens). I will probably add some flair one day.

[Deleted User]

She is a human. Nearly as tall as a man, she sports a figure of slim softness and a dusky olive complexion made darker still by the sun. Glossy black hair hangs loose about her shoulders to frame a heart-shaped face and dark, almond-shaped eyes. A lightly protruding lower lip gives her a natural pout and slightly impetuous appearance when she does not smile. Her shoulders are rather broad for one so slender, and combined with her height gives her a rather regal if somewhat masculine bearing.

Nizana

She is a Chaos Lady. She is slightly above average height at five feet and seven inches tall. Her head is topped with dark, crimson red hair with the entirety of it flowing loosely about her shoulders with the longest strands reaching to her bottom. Her slightly angled, almond shaped eyes appear to be lined darkly to emphasize her bright, emerald green irises, each of which watches her surroundings with an air of curiosity. Her features are obscured by a mask though it can be seen that she has a slender neck. Her lithesome, lily-white physique appears to be on the athletic side, seeming well suited to an active lifestyle. Each of her slender, lightly muscled arms ends in soft hands with nails filed into darkly-painted points. Wrapping her right arm in ink, an intricate tattoo of geometric lines and curves stands out boldly, the occasional openings between shapes showing unidentifiable runes. A modest bust sits above her flat, lightly toned abdomen, her slim waist flaring slightly with her hips. Her long, well-shaped legs end in dainty feet, each of her motions appearing light and at ease. Though slightly resembling a beautiful siren, she has a caved forehead and a chicken-like head and is covered with bumpy skin.

I feel like I need to upgrade/revamp the description.. maybe I'm too critical of my own work, though... and it looked fine when I wrote it however much time ago.

I also tended to go overboard, then. And a bit, now.

Nicaara

So many lovely descriptions! Here's a few things I noticed, though.

@Nizana @KitiaraI find that starting the sentence after "She is <race>." with another "She is" or "She has" never looks terribly good! Switching it around a bit and starting with a noun or verb will definitely improve the flow.

Also, I agree with what @Bluef said on the last thread.. listing exact heights is weird. I did it once, but I find now that the numbers are sometimes off-putting (especially when people type 6ft 4in or something), and leaving height to a descriptor instead of a measurement can be a good thing.

And last.. "Her head is topped with" sounds a little funny to me. You wearin' a wig, gurl?

Razzlo

He is a human and he stands a good head taller than most others of his sex, reaching a height of around six feet or six and a half feet tall. While he is definitely a man of good fitness and health, his arms and legs do not possess the usual build one would likely expect on him with his active lifestyle. This lack of bulky muscles on his arms and legs makes him seem lanky despite his height. This lanky appearance in turn makes his movements seem unwieldy, as if he should find himself naturally clumsy. The muscles he does display are not impressive, but they are clearly defined and look to have been built through persistence in his efforts at swordplay. His skin is a pale brown colour that almost compares with kawhe that has been mixed with copious amounts of milk and cream. Here and there upon his tanned flesh one can see scars and half healed wounds marring his complexion. The healing wounds here and there on his visible flesh stand out with angry hues of red, blue, and purple. His face is made up of hard angles and points, his chin and cheek bones jutting out with a hard strength that serve to make him appear symmetric. Coarse black hair stands up on his head in short bristles like a painter's brush, some tufts askew at odd angles that give the impression that he cuts strands as they begin to get in the way of his movements. In equal blackness, a tightly and finely kept goatee encircles his lips. Each of the short bristles almost appears oiled when light reflects from them. The deep blackness of his hair is further matched by the two dark pools of pitch that are his eyes. Beyond his eyes and hair, his nose is the dominant feature of his face. Like a beak of a hawk, his nose is angled and sharp. The sheer length of the nose easily overshadows the white teeth that sometimes flash from behind his lips when a momentarily grin splits his face in two.

Aedin

Nothing really special needs to be updated though
..
He is a human. From a quick glance over, at him you figure his height is somewhere near six feet tall. His exposed skin, appears to be that of a dark tan from exposure to the sun.  Dark-brownish hair sits atop of his head, the hair is pulled back to a single point at the back the back of his skull, held in place by along wrapping of red string that allows his locks to flow loosely behind his head. Lowering your gaze slight, two dark green eyes with what seems to have a topaz color intertwined around the iris below a furrowed brow. Continuing your observation, a stoic smile can be seen.  Intricate tattoos can be seen above the collar of his clothing of clouds, fishes, and various animals stretching most of the way up his neck and the skin of his exposed right arm.

Tahquil

She is a mhun of abnormal stature. Standing half a head taller than her racial sisters, she 

possesses an immaculate posture that does little to hide her height. A small waist and modest bust 

suggest vaguely to her femininity. Chocolate hair which has been unfashionably cut into layered 

lengths that reach just past narrow shoulders, held from her face with a ribbon of varying ocean 

hues. Her face itself is mostly unremarkable, with moderately fair features and pale skin, though 

her eyes are an exception. Almond shaped and hetero-chromatic, her left is a cerulean hue and the 

right a deep burgundy. A chain of dried wildflowers, once white and purple, encircles her left wrist 

twice.

Tristyn

She is a human. Thin, ghostly skin is stretched across the tall, feminine frame, while spider webs 

of blue-grey veins can be seen clearly on her deceptively feeble looking wrists and arms. Her deep 

and high cheek bones give her complexion an unconventional elegant look. Her sunken eyes host large 

pupils of grey that hides a hint of strong will. Her expressions are often quite neutral, and her 

pale lips move only slightly when she speaks, which can, to some, be rather unsettling. Her face is 

framed neatly on one side by long, intricately braided black hair that has a variety of purple, red, 

and blue beads strung throughout it. While the other side of her head is partly shorn to reveal a 

twisted flame tattoo that flickers just above her ear down to the depths of her shoulder blade. She 

also has several tiny crossed-out names inscribed on her wrist, to memorialize the lost lives of her 

vagrant brethren.

Caoimhaen

He is a graceful tsol'aa. Standing at five foot nine inches tall, his body is built up of strong and wiry muscles as a result of many hours of practice in combat. His eyes are his most striking feature.They range from a dark blue on the outside to green. The pupils of his eyes re not shaped normally but into two oval shapes coming to points at the top and bottom of his pupils clearly revealing his rajamalan ancestry. His eyes are stern and constantly scanning his surroundings. In addition to his eyes, he has light tiger like tattoos along his neck, shoulders, and jaw line. His face itself is somewhat slender, having a smallish nose and full lips. Another very noticeable aspect of his face,vis a jagged scar running from the corner of his right eye,down his cheek and ending just below his mouth. He has large pointed ears, characteristic to that of a tsol'aa. His hair is cut short and styled into a spiked hair style, with just enough hair in the back to be gathered into a small ponytail. His hair itself is a dishwater blonde color with light blonde highlights due to many hours in the sun. Upon looking at him, one can tell he has been through much. His left forearm is gnarled by ugly burn scar, as well as on his left shoulder is a scar from an old stab wound. On the right side of his neck are deep claw marks where an animal of some kind tore at his throat. Near the center of his chest there is what seems to be a large scar of some sort.  His knuckles are gnarled with many scars  as well as the fact that he is also missing his right hand little finger.Upon the palm of his left hand is the scar of the branding of a crude escarbuncle within a border, Mhaldor's coat of arms. 

Nicaara

Tristyn said:

She is a human. Thin, ghostly skin is stretched across the tall, feminine frame, while spider webs 

of blue-grey veins can be seen clearly on her deceptively feeble looking wrists and arms. Her deep 

and high cheek bones give her complexion an unconventional elegant look. Her sunken eyes host large 

pupils of grey that hides a hint of strong will. Her expressions are often quite neutral, and her 

pale lips move only slightly when she speaks, which can, to some, be rather unsettling. Her face is 

framed neatly on one side by long, intricately braided black hair that has a variety of purple, red, 

and blue beads strung throughout it. While the other side of her head is partly shorn to reveal a 

twisted flame tattoo that flickers just above her ear down to the depths of her shoulder blade. She 

also has several tiny crossed-out names inscribed on her wrist, to memorialize the lost lives of her 

vagrant brethren.

Wow, I love it - really well written!

I spy an incomplete sentence though! >.>

Halos

He is a human and is a slim five and a half feet tall. Hawk-nosed and broad-faced, his coal-black eyes are browless and careworn behind round spectacles. His militantly bald head raises questions, but ink-smudged hands do little to dispel the vaguely owlish cast about his olive-skinned form. Delicate fingers fidget infrequently, as if anxious for activity. The acrid scent of smoke emanates faintly from his clothing, evocative of the heady conflagrance of constant sacrifice.

Ellodin

i switch through six descriptions, depending on with/without armour, with/without hairpin, with/without helm (and i only wear helm when wearing armour).  the one I use most often is with armour, no helm, with hairpin.

He is a graceful tsol'aa of close to average size. Fathomless, upturned eyes pierce out from within a stern countenance, the charcoal orbs outlined 

with kohl tracery that spreads outward in elaborate swirls. A portion of his straight, dark hair has been tied into a bun and secured with a hairpin, 

leaving most of it free to flow just past his shoulders and keep his ears uncovered. Burnished sheets of oxidised silver encase the lithe form of this 

austere Tsol'aa, the plates sleek against the body as if to form a second skin. Inlaid with a fine dusting of emerald, engravings swim across the 

gleaming metal in a rush of tight spirals and elongated twirls, the swirling motif mimicking the persistent vines of the undergrowth. Weaving across 

his lean physique, the plates layer from the ankles to the collarbones, exposing only the very top of the robes beneath. The little skin that remains 

visible displays only the faintest hint of a tan. Reinforcing the ageless features of his race, his posture remains ever upright.

Herenicus

He is a human, dark-haired and casting a grim silhouette. His grave countenance recalls a sinister tapestry of cruel angles, punctuated by the purpled rings beneath his eyes. The eyes themselves glow with zealous intensity, near-drained of colour and left an unsettling bluish-white. A glossy mane of sleek burnet drapes past the line of his jaw like an ebon veil. His generous mouth and thin lips animate his features, parting to reveal a toothsome, carnivorous aspect. Having seen the benefit of a close shave, the balance of his grooming suggests an exacting precision that verges on fussiness. A lean musculature and white, unblemished skin unite with the richness of his attire in suggesting membership in the leisure class. Scarcely visible at remove, a lattice of thin scars traverses the back of his hands, disappearing into either sleeve. An angry red escarbuncle has been seared into 

his left palm, eight spokes radiating out in every direction. Spotlessness, striven-for if so briefly achieved, otherwise marks the hands of a man loath to sully them.

positive quality: maybe dressed himself
negative quality: ablutomania

Nicaara

Oh wow, I never thought of that @Ellodin! I just take the easy way out, haha. I'm gonna have to make another description now, yours is too lovely!

And @Herenicus.. wow that's.. masterful.  

Herenicus

Nicaara said:

Oh wow, I never thought of that @Ellodin! I just take the easy way out, haha. I'm gonna have to make another description now, yours is too lovely!

And @Herenicus.. wow that's.. masterful.  

You're a generous critic; I'm sure I've got some corrections to make. At the risk of sounding risque, I'd like to work a colon into this paragraph for the sake of sentence variation. I'll give it some more thought.

Herenicus

Nothing motivates quite like public embarassment. Two sentences are wearing the word "suggest" and must argue over who wore it best

Khaibit

She is a graceful tsol'aa and is tall and waif-like, as if underfed most of her life. Light blonde hair has been bound into a messy bun, a few strands falling around her face. Pale jade-green eyes watch the world from behind long, sooty lashes, tiny flecks of gold breaking up the green. Her fingers and hands are covered with fine silver scars, each one perfectly straight and only visible when the light catches them. Smudges of various chemicals stain her fingertips, dying them strange colours that never seem to wash off.

simples

Nicaara

Herenicus said:

Nothing motivates quite like public embarassment. Two sentences are wearing the word "suggest" and must argue over who wore it best

I think you're right there at the height of description nitpickiness! Try... "..the balance of his grooming offers the hint of an exacting precision that verges on fussiness." Not sure how you'll like that one, but there's only so many synonyms for suggest, the best one I think being "proposes". But I don't like proposes so much. I prefer to be the one doing the proposing

Saurrocene

Umm... Just saw this one today. I present, Jhuil.

She is a winged atavian and looks exactly like Jhui in every way. However, instead of being hung in
the pants, she's hung in the chest.

Sarathai

Saurrocene said:

Umm... Just saw this one today. I present, Jhuil.

She is a winged atavian and looks exactly like Jhui in every way. However, instead of being hung in
the pants, she's hung in the chest.

@Jhui was probably drunk at the time.

Multon

He is a human of just about average height, broad shouldered, with stocky legs and thick sinewy arms that seem to hang too low at his sides. Restless, and frequently seen to dart back and forth, his bloodshot, grey eyes peer out from under a permanently creased brow, and are ringed by dark circles. His mouth and chin bristle with stubble of a coarse hard beard growing in uneven patches around his mouth and along his jaw. His complexion is one of that kind which never looks clean or wholesome with what bare skin that is visible beneath the caked on layer of grime having a pallid, unhealthy, colour to it. On his head he has stiff, black hair, standing jaggedly all over it, and growing down hill almost to his crooked, blunt nose. His hands, which are of a rough, coarse grain, are very dirty; his fingernails are crooked, chewed down, and yellow. His habit of gnawing on them constantly often reveals the few discoloured pegs that are yet scattered in his mouth.

Bluef

Herenicus said:

He is a human, dark-haired and casting a grim silhouette. His grave countenance recalls a sinister tapestry of cruel angles, punctuated by the purpled rings beneath his eyes. The eyes themselves glow with zealous intensity, near-drained of colour and left an unsettling bluish-white. A glossy mane of sleek burnet drapes past the line of his jaw like an ebon veil. His generous mouth and thin lips animate his features, parting to reveal a toothsome, carnivorous aspect. Having seen the benefit of a close shave, the balance of his grooming suggests an exacting precision that verges on fussiness. A lean musculature and white, unblemished skin unite with the richness of his attire in suggesting membership in the leisure class. Scarcely visible at remove, a lattice of thin scars traverses the back of his hands, disappearing into either sleeve. An angry red escarbuncle has been seared into his left palm, eight spokes radiating out in every direction. Spotlessness, striven-for if so briefly achieved, otherwise marks the hands of a man loath to sully them.

positive quality: maybe dressed himself
negative quality: ablutomania

Hai @Herenicus. Boy, you're so fine I bet even the ocean waves when you walk by.  

Herenicus

      

Taraus

Not my current, but possibly my favorite, from the trailer trash meth-fiend days:

She is a beautiful siren, though her form and features have clearly undergone the ravages of abuse. She stands at just a shade over five foot, her small form shivering with periodic tremors. Her complexion has taken on a faded pallor, giving her skin an almost ethereal, translucent quality. Heavy shadows rest below her deepset eyes, making their dark colour seem almost black. Her eyes move restlessly, almost rolling in their sockets, and seem unable to fix on any one point. She appears to have been shaven recently, her scalp covered with a soft, fuzzy layer of new hair, and the starkness this affords only serves to highlight the gauntness of her features; the combination of this with her wandering eyes gives the impression of faint madness. The occasional spark of chaotic energy issues from her fingertips, in seeming tandem with the intermittent tremble that courses over her. The skin on her left forearm hosts a bestial scar, the skin puckered and twisted in a spiral wrapping around from elbow to wrist. Drawn over the irregular flesh are another two tattoos, the ink bold against her pale skin. The first, roughly the size of her palm, is the image of a sparrow in flight over a setting sun. Further down, intricately lettered calligraphy accentuates the remainder of the scar, the phrase circling her wrist in a bracelet-like spiral - 'Mad, Bad and Dangerous to Know'.

Himadaen

He is a human. He is 6.3 ft. tall, his hair is black as night and drops to his shoulders, his eyes 

with a penetrating gaze inspire tremendous respect and his silver colour makes it hard not to stare 

for a moment. The expression on his face hides perfeclty whats going through his head, and leaves 

little room for expressing emotions. Making you wonder if he has any at all. His skin is pale and 

surprisingly smooth. A scar on his left cheek left by a sword gives away signs of his encounters. 

The Mark of Mhaldor can be seen on the left side of his neck. With athletic complexion you can tell 

he is in perfect shape. His stance is intimidating and he is holding firmly the hilt of his blade.