Rocky fields (road).
A noxious, red-hued fog overwhelms the area with a thick, palpable vapour. An
occupied iron gibbet, suspended from a wooden gallows, creaks ominously in the
breeze.
You see exits leading northeast, southeast, and southwest.
1957h, 2607m, 10985e, 11980w xkdb-
TARGET: otha
settarget tar otha
Target tar = otha.
1957h, 2607m, 10995e, 11986w xkdb-
get meteor from pack
shoot otha with meteor
You must regain equilibrium first.
1957h, 2607m, 10995e, 11986w xkdb-You must regain equilibrium first.
1957h, 2607m, 10995e, 11986w xkdb-
You have recovered equilibrium.
1957h, 2607m, 10995e, 11986w exkdb-
get meteor from pack
shoot otha with meteor
1957h, 2607m, 10990e, 11992w exkdb-Your aura of weapons rebounding disappears.
You pull back your bow and release a meteor arrow high into the sky.
1957h, 2607m, 10990e, 11992w ekdb-
As the small star reaches its apex, it moulds into a meteorite and bursts into
flame. It rapidly gains speed as it begins to descend.
1957h, 2607m, 11000e, 11992w ekdb-
You have recovered balance on all limbs.
1957h, 2607m, 11000e, 11992w exkdb-
get meteor from pack
shoot otha with meteor
[Apparently he was standing right next to me the whole time -facepalm-]
1957h, 2607m, 11000e, 11998w exkdb-You pull back your bow and release a meteor arrow high into the sky.
1957h, 2607m, 11000e, 11998w ekdb-
With mounting horror, you realise that the meteorite is heading straight for
your location.
1957h, 2607m, 11000e, 11998w ekdb-
As the small star reaches its apex, it moulds into a meteorite and bursts into
flame. It rapidly gains speed as it begins to descend.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 11998w ekdb-
You have recovered balance on all limbs.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 11998w exkdb-
get meteor from pack
shoot otha with meteor
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w exkdb-
A green eyelash viper begins to follow you.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha points a finger at you and you feel anti-magic sweep over you.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w exkdb-You pull back your bow and release a meteor arrow high into the sky.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-
Otha pricks you twice in rapid succession with his dirk.
A prickly*stinging overcomes your body* fad*ng away into numbness.
Hmmmm. Why must everything be so difficult to figure out?
outr goldenseal
eat goldenseal
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-
Your mind feels suddenly confused and jumbled.
You feel your energy robbed from you as lethargy overtakes you.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-You make a strangled meowing noise and quickly shut up in embarrassment.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-What do you want to eat?
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-
n
You stumble and poke yourself in the eye. [That's one way to go blind I guess]
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-
Otha stands, wide-eyed with terror, as the blazing sphere slams into his body,
burning him horribly.
In your mind's eye, you see Otha Le'Murzen, the Fallen crushed by your meteor.
With mounting horror, you realise that the meteorite is heading straight for
your location.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-
Otha takes a drink from an oaken vial.
1957h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w ekdb-
l
You take a drink from a small pinewood vial.
The elixir heals and soothes you.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w ekdb-
You have recovered balance on all limbs.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-
As the small star reaches its apex, it moulds into a meteorite and bursts into
flame. It rapidly gains speed as it begins to descend.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha pricks you twice in rapid succession with his dirk.
Your insomnia has cleared up.
outr cohosh
eat cohosh
You feel incredibly tired, and fall asleep immediately.
wake
outr cohosh
eat cohosh
stand
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-
None may stand in your way! You are invincible!
You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
stand [b][Not even a message saying I feel asleep again]
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.[/b]
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You remove 1 black cohosh, bringing the total in the Rift to 27.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You eat a black cohosh root.
You suddenly feel incapable of falling asleep.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You are paralysed and unable to do that.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-You must be standing first.
2446h, 2607m, 11020e, 12000w exkdb-
A green eyelash viper's head snaps out to sink its fangs in you.
You are confused as to the effects of the venom.
Your caloric salve dissolves as it ameliorates the extreme cold.
2446h, 2607m, 11005e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha stands, wide-eyed with terror, as the blazing sphere slams into his body,
burning him horribly.
In your mind's eye, you see Otha Le'Murzen, the Fallen crushed by your meteor.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
With mounting horror, you realise that the meteorite is heading straight for
your location.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
outr bloodroot
eat bloodroot
Otha takes a drink from an oaken vial.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-You remove 1 bloodroot leaf, bringing the total in the Rift to 39.
You eat a bloodroot leaf.
Your muscles unlock; you are no longer paralysed.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
You may drink another health or mana elixir.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-There is no exit in that direction.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
There is no exit in that direction.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
You wince as a green eyelash viper's fanged head darts out to bite you.
You are confused as to the effects of the venom.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
You may eat another plant.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
l
Rocky fields (road).
A noxious, red-hued fog overwhelms the area with a thick, palpable vapour.
Jagged chasms rip the land asunder, uneven chunks of stone standing silent
across the barren field. Yawning widely like a bored demon, the wound in the
earth stretches down as far as the eye can see, the walls within baring uneven
layers of moist stone. The ground is covered in mounds and bumps, making the
slick, black earth a hazardous obstacle for any traveller. Twin peaks loom
northwards, casting the region into near-total darkness. An occupied iron
gibbet, suspended from a wooden gallows, creaks ominously in the breeze. A
green eyelash viper is slithering about here.
You see exits leading northeast, southeast, and southwest.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-
Your exhausted mind can stay awake no longer, and you fall into a deep sleep.
2446h, 2607m, 11015e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha stands, wide-eyed with terror, as the blazing sphere slams into his body,
burning him horribly.
In your mind's eye, you see Otha Le'Murzen, the Fallen crushed by your meteor.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha takes a drink from an oaken vial.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-
wake
You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
stand
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-You stand up and stretch your arms out wide.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha pricks you twice in rapid succession with his dirk.
Your insomnia has cleared up.
outr cohosh
eat cohosh
You feel incredibly tired, and fall asleep immediately.
wake
outr cohosh
eat cohosh
stand
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-
n

None may stand in your way! You are invincible!
You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
stand [Again, no sleep message after waking up]
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-You wail like an old woman.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-What do you want to eat?
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-You stand up and stretch your arms out wide.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-There is no exit in that direction.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-You are not fallen or kneeling.
2446h, 2607m, 11059e, 12000w exkdb-
Your exhausted mind can stay awake no longer, and you fall into a deep sleep.
2446h, 2607m, 11069e, 12000w exkdb-
l
You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-
outr bloodroot
eat bloodroot
You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha takes a drink from a cedarwood vial.
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-
wake
You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
stand
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-
s [This is just a wtf moment. I typed S to go south, and I went to sleep...]
You close your eyes, curl up in a ball, and fall asleep.
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-
se
You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-
Otha pricks you twice in rapid succession with his dirk.
You feel yourself calm down as the kola nut wears off.
2446h, 2607m, 11113e, 12000w exdb-
None may stand in your way! You are invincible!
You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
stand
2446h, 2607m, 11113e, 12000w exdb-You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11113e, 12000w exdb-
wake
You begin your struggle to escape from the dreamworld.
2446h, 2607m, 11113e, 12000w exdb-
t
You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11113e, 12000w exdb-
You continue your struggle to escape from the dreamworld.
2446h, 2607m, 11098e, 12000w exdb-
You open your eyes and yawn mightily.
stand
2446h, 2607m, 11118e, 12000w exdb-
wake
You flip the bird.
2446h, 2607m, 11118e, 12000w exdb-You already are awake.
2446h, 2607m, 11118e, 12000w exdb-
A green eyelash viper's head snaps out to sink its fangs in you.
You cease to wield a darkbow.
You are confused as to the effects of the venom.
2446h, 2607m, 11118e, 12000w exdb-
Otha pricks you twice in rapid succession with his dirk.
You feel a tightening sensation grow in your lungs.
ColourNote("black", "red", "Asthma")
outr kelp
eat kelp
A pr*ckly stinging o*e*comes your body, fading away into numbness.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-Most perplexing.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-You remove 1 kelp, bringing the total in the Rift to 95.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-My friend, clearly you know little of the sultry tango, if you think that you
can perform it without a partner.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-
l

You may eat another plant.
You eat a piece of kelp.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-Rocky fields (road).
A noxious, red-hued fog overwhelms the area with a thick, palpable vapour.
Jagged chasms rip the land asunder, uneven chunks of stone standing silent
across the barren field. Yawning widely like a bored demon, the wound in the
earth stretches down as far as the eye can see, the walls within baring uneven
layers of moist stone. The ground is covered in mounds and bumps, making the
slick, black earth a hazardous obstacle for any traveller. Twin peaks loom
northwards, casting the region into near-total darkness. An occupied iron
gibbet, suspended from a wooden gallows, creaks ominously in the breeze. A
green eyelash viper is slithering about here.
You see exits leading northeast, southeast, and southwest.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-
Otha snaps his fingers in front of you.
THIEF THIEF!
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-
You shuffle your feet noisily, suddenly bored. [Triggered this to eat Goldenseal]
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-
Otha pricks you twice in rapid succession with his dirk.
The idea of eating or drinking is repulsive to you.

apply epidermal to torso
You notice that your sweat glands have begun to rapidly secrete a foul, oily
substance.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-
You swoon as you suffer a toxic relapse.
Your vision is flooded with light, and your face suddenly reddens.
ColourNote("black","red","Darkshade")
outr ginseng
eat ginseng
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-
You wince as a green eyelash viper's fanged head darts out to bite you.
You are confused as to the effects of the venom.
2446h, 2607m, 11128e, 12000w exdb-2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-You take out some salve and quickly rub it on your torso.
The salve slides off your oily skin.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
se
Interesting...
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-You pick your nose absently. [Kodak moment.]
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-You let out a loud, long "MOOOOOOOOOOO!"
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-You are paralysed and cannot do that.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
se
You are paralysed and cannot do that.
outr bloodroot
eat bloodroot
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-You remove 1 bloodroot leaf, bringing the total in the Rift to 38.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-The idea of putting something in your stomach sickens you.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
Your mind feels suddenly confused and jumbled.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
outr bloodroot
eat bloodroot
You are paralysed and are unable to drop anything.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
se
The idea of putting something in your stomach sickens you.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-You are paralysed and cannot do that.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
Otha raises his longsword over his head and begins to swing it in a wide
circle, gaining speed as he goes.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
se
Tears fill your eyes and begin to slowly run down your face.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
se
You are paralysed and cannot do that.
outr bloodroot
eat bloodroot
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-You remove 1 bloodroot leaf, bringing the total in the Rift to 37.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-The idea of putting something in your stomach sickens you.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
You begin feeling slightly flushed.

sip immunity
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w exdb-
outr bloodroot
eat bloodroot

Your mental equilibrium scatters suddenly, upset by some unknown source.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
se
Tears fill your eyes and begin to slowly run down your face.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-You get down on one knee and serenade the world.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-The idea of putting something in your stomach sickens you.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-You are paralysed and cannot do that.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
se
The ground seems to tilt and you fall with a thump.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w db-
s
There is no exit in that direction.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w db-
You have recovered balance on all limbs.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
You wince as a green eyelash viper's fanged head darts out to bite you.
You are confused as to the effects of the venom.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
Orac has been pounded into the ground by a mighty earth golem.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
Otha begins to bear down on you with his whirling longsword.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
Blood begins to slowly drip from your nose.

sip immunity
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you. [Again...no sleep message, unless it's an illusion]
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
l
You are asleep and can do nothing. WAKE will attempt to wake you.
2446h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w xdb-
A roar of triumph bursts from Otha and with horrified realization, you watch as
he brings his whirling longsword towards your neck, severing your head from
your body. The last thing you see before death is your own crumpling body, neck
spitting blood like a fountain.
You have been slain by Otha.
Mercifully, the voyria venom has been cleansed from your body. [Well thank the gods for that.]
A piece of kelp falls out of your inventory.
A bloodroot leaf falls out of your inventory.
A bloodroot leaf falls out of your inventory.
0h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
wake
You are dead and cannot do that.
0h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
Otha ceases to wield a shining steel longsword in his right hand.
0h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
Otha begins to wield an iron-tipped whip in his right hand.
0h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
You are dead, perhaps you should "Pray for Salvation".
Brilliant! Dumb it down for me?
0h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
(Gawi's Family): Gawi says, "Omg."
0h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
l
Rocky fields (road).
A noxious, red-hued fog overwhelms the area with a thick, palpable vapour.
Jagged chasms rip the land asunder, uneven chunks of stone standing silent
across the barren field. Yawning widely like a bored demon, the wound in the
earth stretches down as far as the eye can see, the walls within baring uneven
layers of moist stone. The ground is covered in mounds and bumps, making the
slick, black earth a hazardous obstacle for any traveller. Twin peaks loom
northwards, casting the region into near-total darkness. An occupied iron
gibbet, suspended from a wooden gallows, creaks ominously in the breeze. A
green eyelash viper is slithering about here.
You see exits leading northeast, southeast, and southwest.
0h, 2607m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
Your mana drains away as you concentrate on maintaining a link with the living.
0h, 2457m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
(Gawi's Family): Gawi says, "Im going to kill him."
0h, 2457m, 11130e, 12000w ex-
A ghostly apparition glances briefly northeastwards and dashes off into the
distance.
0h, 2457m, 11130e, 12000w ex-

They must be. I've never stayed asleep that long before, never even long enough to bind. So is this something you just have to be on the look out for, or is there a preventative method?

1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-
Your mind feels suddenly confused and jumbled.
You feel your energy robbed from you as lethargy overtakes you.
1957h, 2607m, 11010e, 12000w ekdb-

2446h, 2607m, 11089e, 12000w exkdb-
s [This is just a wtf moment. I typed S to go south, and I went to sleep...]
You close your eyes, curl up in a ball, and fall asleep.

Otha pricks you twice in rapid succession with his dirk.
You feel a tightening sensation grow in your lungs.
ColourNote("black", "red", "Asthma")

Thank you for the tips. Also, I've been trying to set up an archery system in Mush that allows me to just type aim and it will search line of sights and aim in the direction of what I have targeted, then auto shoot in the same direction once it recieves a successful aim message, and upon a sucessful strike, send <target> hit with arrow(or meteor) to PT. I tried triggering the aim line to Shoot @t n, shoot @t s, etc, but it runs through all the directions and doesn't shoot, even when I know they are in line of sight.

I use an alias to FIRE <dir>....usually I know where my targets are. FIRE N, for instance, snipes north (after aiming). Instead of checking LoS, try rigging it to fire in every direction and gag out the unsuccessful ones? Probably take less time than squinting every direction and then firing once you found them.

Thank you for the tips. Also, I've been trying to set up an archery system in Mush that allows me to just type aim and it will search line of sights and aim in the direction of what I have targeted, then auto shoot in the same direction once it recieves a successful aim message, and upon a sucessful strike, send <target> hit with arrow(or meteor) to PT. I tried triggering the aim line to Shoot @t n, shoot @t s, etc, but it runs through all the directions and doesn't shoot, even when I know they are in line of sight.

Yeah, that's why I was trying to set it up, so I wouldn't have to worry about tracking and squinting. But like I said, it goes through every direction without firing on the target, even when I know they are adjacent. Also, does FIRE <direction> work just for snipe? I don't have snipe yet, so I'm probably going to have to just keep with Shoot @t <direction>.

That's what mine looks like, the alias is fire..$X is my target, $1 captures the variable right after the alias (I run Nexus).

I'd have it like..
Alias: Fire
What it does: shoot @t w ; shoot @t nw ; shoot @t n..

And then set it to capture the direction from the successful shot thing (That gives direction doesn't it?). Then again, probably easier to just FIRE N, FIRE NW, etc manually.

It doesn't help that you were falling asleep naturally the entire time either.

Yes well, when you log in and your city is being raided, you don't exactly take a personal nap time. Did what I could.

For future reference: Posting the combat log of someone without seeking the prior approval is generally frowned upon.

Your mind feels suddenly confused and jumbled.
You feel your energy robbed from you as lethargy overtakes you.

Really? I find meteors quite soothing.

I was meteoring. Didn't help he was standing next to me.

He would have left you alone if you took a nap, see?

Kresslack has been executed by Otha while sleeping.

I don't nap during raids. Besides, it would have just been:

Or you could have used the Tiax Combat Method!

What's that?

Public News #14810
Date: 2005-06-03
From : High Hooligan Tiax Drac'kal, Mad with Power
To : Everyone
Subject : The Amazing Tiax Combat Strategy

I've decided that it is time to share the secrets of the Amazing Tiax
Combat Strategy with the world. Aren't you just the lucky little
bastards?

The Amazing Tiax Combat Strategy has allowed me to use the power of my
exceptional cowardice to guide me through more than a few sticky
situations throughout the years. If you undertake the daunting task of
learning these secrets, you too can draw on the power of your cowardice,
fear, and outright wimpiness.

Beginners
=========
The Amazing Tiax Combat Strategy is similiar in many ways to the
strategies of Sapience's top combatants. They have, over many grueling
years of painful combat trained their bodies to respond reflexively to
many situations in combat. Instead of training myself to, say sip a vial
or eat an herb when I find myself under attack, I took a new, and
somewhat unorthodox approach. The true power of the Amazing Tiax Combat
Strategy lies in it's uniqueness. When I find myself under attack, I am
able to curl up into the fetal position, slowly rock back and forth, and
whimper like a wounded puppy. I can do all of this without even having
to think. It is as natural to me as stabbing babies is to a Mhaldaathi.

Of course, you cannot expect to perform a three stage response like mine
on your first try. It is very important that you stick to the basics
when you're starting out. Novices trying to be fancy can lead to many
unfortunate things, such as bruised kidneys, accidental
self-impregnation and involuntary attempts by your spine to escape your
body - through your anus (and no one wants that last one, with the
possible exception of some Apostates, who I hear are into that sort of
thing).

The basic Amazing Tiax Combat Strategy involves curling your body into
the fetal position, just like you were back in your mother's womb, and
then silently wishing that she had never been so cruel as to pop you out
into this painful world. You then remain in this position and hope that
whatever was attacking you goes away before you die. Once your assailant
has left, you slowly climb to your feet, and run home crying and find
someone to hold you and give you some hard candy. Grandmothers work well
for this.

Practice
========
It is not advisable to go out and pick a fight with a powerful opponent
on your first try. You will likely not yet be up to the challenge, and
your cowering may not be sufficient to guide you to safety. Thus, one
must find weaker opponents to develop one's skills against. For your
first effort, I reccomend sucker punching a kitten to get the fight
started, and then making your attempt at the position. With luck, the
punch will have weakened the kitten, and you will be able to survive
even without perfect form. COntinue to find stronger opponents as you
improve.

Advanced Moves
==============
After enough practice, you will be able to incorporate extra moves into
your strategy. As I expained i nthe introduction, I employ a three stage
strategy of cowering, slow rocking and whimpering. Other options include
thumb sucking, clingling to stuffed animals, or even adding in some
manly tears. One must be careful to not jump from the simple to the
extremely complex too quickly. Add in a single item at a time, and
always be sure to remember your basics.

Additionally, the Amazing TIax Combat Strategy can be modified for group
combat. For example, if you find yourself with a strong ally. Cling to
their leg, with your eyes tightly closed, and cry out "Are the mean men
gone yet?" Once two of you have staved off your enemies, have your
friend carry you back to your city, and make you some hot chocolate and
read you a story. Then, you can brag to your friends about how mighty
you are.

Frequently Asked Question
=========================
Many of you out there might think you've already got a good combat
strategy. You'll be asking, "But Tiax, I've already got a great
strategy! I can beat up my opponents like a priest on an orphan who
won't stop asking for candy! Why should I bother to change?"

The simple answer to this is that the Amazing Tiax Combat Strategy is
the only combat strategy that proclaims itself to be amazing right in
the name! Also, it comes with my name in the title! Whenever you see my
name on something, you can be assured of its exceptional mediocrity
(with the exception of my ill-fated puppy-flavored pudding treats, those
just don't count). No other combat strategy has a name as prestigious as
mine, and if they do, I'll make mine longer! Also, the Amazing Tiax
Combat Strategy is easily modified to suit any situation!

-Tiax, Grandmaster of Cowardly Combat and Stuff

Penned by my hand on the 13th of Daedalan, in the year 394 AF.

That's classic.